I’m Not That Kinda Guy
Joseph is still in bed, not ready to get up and dressed. He says sleepily, “I’m not that kinda trash guy.” (What?) “I was taking out the recycling and a yucky soda bottle fell out and I picked it up and put it back in. Cause I’m not that kind of guy. I’m not the kind of guy who would leave trash. I pick it up if it’s on the ground. I’m that kind of guy.”
A Part of Some System
J: Hey mom, I’m part of an immune system.
Me: An immune system?
J: Yeah, if you buy something, you are part of it. Like I bought that truck.
Me: You mean you are part of the economy?
J: Oh yeah. The economy.
Me: Where’d you learn that?
J: A movie.
Me: What was the movie about?
J: What I’m a part of.
Me: What else are you a part of?
J: Nothing. Well, the family.
Me: How about the economy?
J: Just the family and the economy.
Me: So how does it feel to be part of two things?
J: At first I didn’t even know I was a part of something.
Baby Shower and Names
Me: So Maddie, your class is going to have a baby shower for Miss Heather tomorrow. Do you know what a baby shower is?
M: It’s where you wash the babies. You wash their heads, like this. (She demonstrates.)
Me: No… Joseph, do you know?
J: It’s where the person having the baby opens presents. Then you talk.
Me: Do you guys know what Miss Heather is going to name her baby? It is going to be a girl.
M: No.
J: Maurice?
Me: Maurice, really? That’s your guess?
J: Yeah. Maurice!
Me: No. Savannah. Savannah Jean.
J: You mean, like a caravan of bulls?
Me: What is a caravan of bulls?
J: Well, what’s a caravan?
Me: A line.
J: Ok, yeah, then a line of bulls. Why does her name mean a line of bulls?
Me: It doesn’t. It’s just a cute name.
J: But I thought you said a caravan was a line?
(A few minutes later)
Me: So do you remember what I said the baby’s name will be?
M: No.
J: Victoria!
Me: Really?
M: Jeans?
J: Jane. Jane Smith!
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